World Mental Health Day- Therapist reveals reasons people avoid help and ways to nurture wellness

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According to the World Health Organisation (WHO), the world is experiencing a sort of mental health crisis on the heels of the Covid-19 pandemic. 

The WHO estimates a 25-per-cent spike in anxiety and depressive disorders during the first year of the pandemic. 

In addition to the growing social and economic stresses, as well as the political climate that’s taking a global toll, many people are experiencing very real and personal losses during these difficult times. 

This year’s World Mental Health Day theme is Making Mental Health & Well-Being for All a Global Priority. The impact of disruption in services and treatments during the pandemic is still felt today. Even as services and face-to-face interaction begin to resume, there are other factors, according to Janice Lam, Hong Kong psychotherapist and founder of She & Co. Therapy, that may hinder individuals from seeking and getting the help they need. 

From financial woes to the fear of stigmatisation associated with treatment, Lam says six factors often contribute to a delay or hesitation to seek help. Specialising in therapy for working mothers, Lam also delves into some of the most common challenges facing women today and ways to deal with the pressures that come with ‘having it all’.

#What are some of the reasons people are hesitant to reach out to therapists for help?

#With a focus on working mothers, what would you say are some of the most common mental health and wellness issues they face? 

#What’s the difference between seeking advice from a professional and talking to a friend?

#For those who might not have the resources to seek help, are there any self-help tips you can share with mothers struggling in the workplace?

What are some of the reasons people are hesitant to reach out to therapists for help?

Stigma

Concerns about what others, including the source of help herself, might think of them if they were to seek help. Misconceptions: Some of us may hesitate to go to therapy because we believe our problems are not critical or serious enough to seek professional help. There are common misconceptions that therapy is only for those with serious mental conditions, and it’s not until things become totally unmanageable that I need to see a therapist. 

Concerns on confidentiality and trust

Some of us may also stress over what the person thinks about what is being shared. A therapist is bound professionally to provide a safe, confidential and non-judgmental space for you as well as offer unconditional acceptance, respect and support from an impartial position.

Inability to identify symptoms

Last year, a research study examined whether the local Hong Kong public has adequate knowledge to identify mental health symptoms and the need for timely professional help. It found a low rate of mental health knowledge in our local Hong Kong public. It was also revealed that the population has a poor proficiency in identifying subtle mental health symptoms, which was consistently associated with higher reluctance to professional help-seeking. 

Reliance on self

For some people, there’s a preference for relying on themselves, and they don’t see a need for help. They have a high reliance on themselves to solve problems and a negative attitude about seeking professional help. They would rather turn to friends or family if they had to seek support. Some of them simply don’t feel comfortable revealing or discussing personal matters with a stranger.  

Lack of accessibility

Factors such as time, transport, and costs, could be a major barrier. 

Misguided expectations

From my personal experience, some people had an unpleasant or disappointing experience with therapy and feel hesitant to give it another go— for example, a mismatch of expectations on the outcome or a mismatch with the therapist. I’ve heard stories of people who went to see a psychiatrist with the expectation that he would provide psychotherapy. At the end, when only medications were prescribed, they hesitated to take them, resulting in the impression that seeking professional help isn’t helpful. 

What’s the difference between seeking advice from a professional and talking to a friend?

The key difference between a trained therapist and a friend is that a trained therapist isn’t there just to comfort you. 

Therapists can:  

Identify any underlying mental health concerns that need to be addressed.

Depending on the therapeutic approach she uses, she would help uncover any unhelpful thought and behavioural pattern that may be contributing to your problem as she explores your unique circumstances and objectives with you collaboratively. 

Provide scientific methods and effective tools that help address your problems

While having supportive friends or a trusted family member is a helpful and comforting resource during challenging circumstances, it should not be seen as a substitute for professional support offered by a trained psychotherapist. 

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Shutterstock

With a focus on working mothers, what would you say are some of the most common mental health and wellness issues they face? 

Among my working mum clients, common issues and complaints include burnout, stress, growing tensions with their partner or family members, and heightened irritability and frustrations. 

Many working mothers feel exhausted and overwhelmed all the time from working around the clock. Apart from striving to deliver the same amount and level of work, if not more, as their coworkers, they are also keeping the household and family running and, of course, looking after the well-being of their little human beings. 

Young mothers are often extremely sleep-deprived from feeding and attending to their babies. Poor self-care is also common; lack of exercise and social activities, and poor eating habits, all lead to unhealthy physical and psychological well-being, such as nutritional deficiency, weight gain, chronic backache, hypertension, etc.

For those who might not have the resources to seek help, are there any self-help tips you can share with mothers struggling in the workplace?

As a mother, I understand it’s easy to get lost in the demands of motherhood that you forget to take some time out just for yourself. Self-care might sound unrealistic, but it is as important as caring for your little ones and family. Even just a few minutes a day can help you reconnect with yourself. 

Self-care isn’t about doing your nails or getting a facial treatment. For some of us, it does help us relax and feel good, but it’s not all of it. Make yourself a priority, honour any rituals or routines that make you feel at peace or allow yourself a moment to breathe. Find ways to share your thoughts and feelings, such as journaling or talking to a community of people who can hold space for you. 

Most importantly, learn to ask for support when you need it. Get someone to help with things you may need to do around the house, and organise someone to babysit the child when you meet up with friends for a meal. 

Besides, many therapists offer sliding scales – meaning they are willing to adjust their fees for clients to get into therapy. Be open to checking with them and discussing the options. There are also some affordable resources from public mental health services.

Also see: The downside of connectivity- can fitness apps and devices harm our health?

Author(s)
Gloria Fung Photo

Health & Fitness Editor